Finally outside again

Yesterday I had a photoshoot outside with Tasha, a friend from cheer, and it was just beautiful outside. I'm talking B-E-A-U-tiful. And then today I just went outside with some headphones and just relaxed, thought of nothing and lost myself. Then it was time to snap back to reality, I got so caught up in the music I was late to sell yearbooks and sell cotton candy (cotton candy was today only) I did that for an hour then went to class which was short, then went back to selling. 3 hours of selling, then 2 hours to kill till class, work time. did Communication Technology and culture class essay. Still working on it almost done. It's interesting. I'm looking at how the internet has changed us as a generation and made us just sooo different from our parents. In the way we learn and are raised.
Anyways, I'm getting older, you realize that. I'm almost done my first year of university. I'm one step closer to the rest of my life, it's actually happening I'm growing up...
I was talking to will yesterday and we were just talking like we usually do and I was just sitting there listening to what he had to say and it made me think, It's almost like we're hitting another puberty in life, we're learning so much about ourselves by going through each of our respected programs, not just will and I but everyone of our friends. And I'm wondering, is the person that we're learning about really who we are? I've learned a lot about myself and have explored other sides of myself which I hadn't before...But is the picture I have of myself in my head who I really am? People see me different than who I think I am I know that, but is who I think I am really who I am? If that makes any sense at all...
I know what I'm supposed to do in life. I have no doubts that I'll be a photographer, but who will I be. Everyone is so worried about what they are going to be that they don;t care about who they are anymore. I think if you know who you are then you will know what you want to do. People just seem to have the wrong idea. They need to figure themselves out first and then you'll see what your ment to do. I know that it's harder than I'm saying it is but still that;s my advice.
As I tell people to figure themselves out I realize that I'm losing sight of who I am. After school is over I really need to take a look at myself again. But do I want to see the same thing? Talking to Will made me think about changing something, just to keep the mediocrity out of life. To change things, i dunno what i'll do to do this, Cut my hair short, get a piercing something along those lines, just so when i look in the mirror i'll see something differnet. I'm had this same shell for a long time, it's time for a change, I'm tried, not tired of myself just my shell.
I dunno what is distracting me or if i've just not cared lately, but i don't have any crushes or prospects. None, i mean i just don't think i'm in a place to have a relationship right now. And i don't even feel starved for affection, or human contact, my friends are all there with open arm if i'm feeling down. It's not that i'm mistaking friendships with a loving relationship but it's just not a priority for me right now. I remember a few months ago i wanted to be in a realtionship but right now and for the past few months i just haven't been interested.
I realize that i haven;t been interested but i haven;t noticed anyone trying to get close to me, and it makes me think, do people who just don't seem interested in being in a realtionship send out a vibe and people jsut know not to go there, i dunno maybe i'm crazy, not going to give any deep thought to that.
I mean if something came up i would gladly get involved, but i don;t want a meaningless realationship, you know me, and right now i guess i don't feel that i could be there for that person as much as i would usually be, right now i need to figure myself out. Hey, maybe this will all change once schools out. all i know is that either soon or later down the road Someone will come along, and when she does i'll be ready....

Back to work now,

-Pete-

Welcome to the Wonderful World of New Music

Check out this link and get connected to an amazing guide to explore this vast world of new music.

http://www.di.fm/edmguide/edmguide.html

It's a great way to widen your musical taste. They have information on the history of each genre of new music and where it's roots are. Plus they have like 5-10 samples of each genre.

Check it out, you won't regret it

-Pete-

Just what I needed!

Oh man, Today was a good day. And after a lot of stressing aobut the weeks to come it just got me out of my rutt and is getting me to focus. Let me tell you bout this awesome day...will you let me? of course you will
Alright so it starts out with going into the darkroom for photo class and then in the next photo class we get assignments back and i get 80 and 90 on them, then i find out i got 90 on an essay proposal (class average 75) :) also my film midterm (the first one) i got 20 out of 20 (but everyone did, mostly) but still, so good marks make a good day right? well kinda but not totally.
Today i had the final end of the year cheer party. Time to say goodbye to the team till summer practises and just review the year. We gathered at the Madarin for all you can eat food! (what else would you do there) Anyways after the grub came the emotional stuff. Found out Angela is coming back as a manager not a flyer, we also got talks from her, cilla and of course the one and only Tara. Tara addressed each individual around the table, skipping over me and talking about me at the end, not sure why but i felt special, What she says to each person is totally true and she spoke of their stamina drive and contsant pushing to reach the goals they set out to reach, we had some laughs along the way too. What she said to me ment a lot. She thanked me for not caring about what people outside of the team thought, how i took the sometimes negitive engery that i recived and used to to push me farther. I thank Tara for giving me a chance on this team and giving me a great oppertunity to grow. I love every member of that team and have no regrets joining the team. I owe joining to Julie and Kat from my floor who dragged me half the way to athletics so i could try out! Thanks girls! And thanks to the other girls for the constant support! Same goes out to all the others that support me in this interesting athletic choice.
Jill and Penny are our new co captians and lovely Cilla is our new captin. After that was announced i thought it was over but no no no Anglea pulls out this spirit stick (this is the only cliche cheerleader thing we do, no pom poms but we do do this, and yes it is in bring it on) The spirit stick was awared to me Angela said, i was blown away, i'm so touched that they wanted me to be awarded it. Showing spirit for the team no matter what happens, and i think i see where they are coming from, these girls have taken me in for who i am and i have become close friends with everyone. How could i not have spirit for this team, it's easy. But that made my day. Penny was the one to get the stick before me, Spirit buddies! She is the ultimate cheerleader.
The other award given out tonight was the MVC, Most Valuable Cheerleader, and this was given to Marsha with good reason, she is just so driven to improve, it's intense, you gotta love her.
After the filling dinner it was back to rez to hang out with some of the cheerleaders and watch sex and the city (Martha, Jann, and Renee) Good times
Well that's that, listening to some great music now well still and some new stuff, thanks Liss can i have more?

Till next time,

-Pete-

P.S Photo's to come

Temp Hermit

I really haven't been around a ton or talking to many people lately. What have I been doing? Lot of nothing really, thinking i guess. I've been going outside enjoying the new spring weather, running, biking and such. Since cheer is over it's going to be up to me to stay active since there are not mandatory practises as of now. Luckily over the summer we will have practises, plus i'll have twice a week frisbee games to go to which are always exausting. People don;t give that sport enough credit. I love it, I mean i was never that great of a runner but it's really conditioned me to become a better runner and develop endurace ((to not extrreme whatsoever but better than before is all i'm saying.) And with cheer on top of that I'm starting to like being active and all that exersice that. Weird coming off my fingers onto the computer but hey that's what's happening, i think i'm growing up or maturing or something like that.
Strange.
I think that's why I've been keeping to myself.
I'm figuring the new me out. This place has been changing my outlook on life and i still have 3 years to go, how am i going to turn out when i get out of this place.
University is a different place for everyone, for some it's just a gateway to a great job, for some it's all just to get a piece of paper to prove they are smart. For others trying to escape to the real world are dissipointed to find that it's just like high school with cliques and gossip just like before. And for other still and what i hope is the majority it is a cacoon where they come to develop in to the adult that they will be from the day they graduate till the day they die. This is what i think it is for me. My course has really opened up my eyes to a lot of things.
Another thing i've been doing is listening to Jack Johnson's On & On album, with songs like Traffic In the Sky, Horizon Has Been Defeated, Cookie Jar, and Times Like These. This album really speaks to me, now more than ever. The album talks about problems facing our socitey today. The Song that really speaks to me is Gone. All about the materialistic people who dominate todays culture. Here are the lyrics for this great song.

"Gone"

Look at all those fancy clothes,
But these could keep us warm just like those.
And what about your soul? Is it cold?
Is it straight from the mold, and ready to be sold?

And cars and phones and diamond rings,
Bling, bling, because those are only removable things.
And what about your mind? Does it shine?
Are there things that concern you, more than your time?

Gone, going.
Gone, everything.
Gone, don’t give a damn.
Gone, be the birds, when they don’t wanna sing.
Gone, people, all awkward with their things,
Gone.

Look at you, out to make a deal.
You try to be appealing, but you lose your appeal.
And what about those shoes you’re in today?
They’ll do no good, on the bridges you burnt along the way.

And you're willing to sell, anything?
Gone, with your head.
Leave your footprints,
And we’ll shame them with our words.
Gone, people, all careless and consumed, gone

Gone, gone, gone, everything.
Gone, don’t give a damn.
Gone, be the birds, when they don’t wanna sing.
Gone, people, all awkward with their things, Gone.


So that's that, if you get a chance to listen to the actual song do it. The melody is amazing and the whole song just makes sense.
I have more to say but not now...

take care all

-Pete-